Crash Diet or Diet Crash?

I’ve been looking for something to help me lose weight for some time now. I’ve tried low carb, high carb (clearly a mistake), high protein, low calorie plus dancercise, aerobics, weight training, even isometrics. I have refused diet pills though, I’m not partial to meds. Still haven’t lost weight. But with the wedding coming up, I have to lose weight quick! What to do?